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Improved X-Ray Specs
  • Created using new Pleadian technology
  • See through walls, doors and most clothing
  • Do NOT look at Grandpa using IXRS!! Serious trauma may result.

Robo Super Ears
  • Increases hearing powers 500%
  • Excellent for survelliance, nature, blackmail
  • Listening to rock music with RSE can cause hearing damage or  head explosion
Basement Zombie Kit
  • Create real zombies easily in your own home!!
  • Contains highly radioactive isotopes for clear night viewing
  • Safety gear sold separately
Our team of crack scientists are feverishly working day and night to create new and wonderful technologies for you all. Soon, the world will look very different...and even taste different. And we do this not merely for great financial gain, but also to create a new and more appealing world for us and for our children. Well, for somebody's children, anyway. Or maybe their pets. Or possibly their pets children.
Telepathy Enhancer
  • Safely increase mind reading abilities!
  • Finally know what your best friends REALLY think
  • Easily communicate silently with loved ones, strangers, dogs, cats, plants and space aliens
Rocket Powered Bike
  • Never pedal again!!
  • Multiple rocket engines increase speed exponentially
  • Braking system not included or even considered

Hyperellipsulagongulator
  • We're not quite sure what these are, but we have a lot in stock. You probably need at least one.
Mind Cloner
  • Switch your consciousness into another living being! 
  • Survive for centuries as a giant tortoise! 
  • WARNING: Cloner only works with giant tortoises. So it's tortoise or nothing.